I'll give it a little credit: It's a nice color, bourbon is. I suppose it's possible that not all of the members of Family Bourbon smell quite so much like...an AA meeting, actually: cigarettes, bad coffee, despair.

I must admit, I did not whiff the Jack Daniels while you charming gentlemen were here, and it was not your brand that so offended my delicate sensibilities. We always try to get booze that we know our guests like, so for the party we ended up with Bullet. You might be able to better inform me of the olfactory merits of JD vs. Bullet, but I have a feeling that I'm just not a bourbon girl. I have other ways of demonstrating my dominance.