(no subject)

[oiran]

Rumors of my death, etc., etc.

I know that most of my f-list is here because of the promise of dirty stories. I don't know why I'm feeling the need to announce this, but here goes: I doubt I'm going to be writing any more porn about gay teenage Superman. As for other categories of media-based derivative erotica (i.e., yay! cartoon dick!), I have a few things in the works, but I don't believe there's much of an audience for them. Still, I'll finish and post this YnM story that I was supposed to post for the 101 comm at the beginning of the month, and then I'll be "done" for the forseeable future.

So, instead of fanfic, I'm going to work on original stories, which have been virtually ignored for the last couple of years. Nanowrimo is coming and I have an idea I can work with this year. Unsurprisingly, it's got a whopping huge homoerotic component. As that comes pretty easily to me at this point, I'm confident the project will go more or less smoothly. Which is what I said last year, and my Nano attempt was a disaster--but that was last year.

I'm not leaving, per se. I'm keeping my journal. I'm not taking down my site. I don't hate Smallville, and I'm still watching it, but it doesn't really engage me this season. It's not a bad sign, necessarily, but it's a sign of something that my favorite character is Jason, and I'm enjoying Lana. I've got a bunch of ideas that I may or may not finish as fanfiction, but I'm in no hurry to do so.

I've spent two years being the most "popular" I've ever been in my life, and I've discovered I'm no good at it. I don't like the responsibility, and I'm terrible at meeting (or even recognizing) social obligations, as anyone who knows me well can attest.

I did think about deleting my journal but I'm pretty comfortable being "velvetglove" at this point. Rather, I'll leave it up to fannish people to leave me on their lists or not.

Mr. Glove outed me to some RL friends, which upset me more than I thought it would. They already knew I wrote porn, and that I wrote m/m porn. I just hadn't ever told them about the media/derivative aspect because that's what I find embarrassing. I can talk about cock all day long, so long as I don't have to mention that it's Clark Kent's cock that gets me all the positive attention online.

obadiah: No one knows why my dog was so ill. Pathology showed nothing. While all agree that this was probably a mycobacterium of some sort, there's no proof. Based on his symptoms, the most likely culprit should have been easily identified, but that wasn't the case. We're not feeling the closure like we'd hoped, though neither is our Beloved Veterinarian, which does provide a bit of perverse comfort.

We're going to wait until after our trip to New Orleans and then we'll pick up his ashes and…do whatever. I really don't know.

nola: As for Halloween in New Orleans, I have fangs. And dainty girl horns. And my tiara will finally have a public showing.

Comments

[rhiannonhero.livejournal.com]

Yay for no carbon monoxide poisoning. I'm obviously going to defriend you now that you're not writing SV porn. That's all I liked you for anyway. Heh.

Also, I love you, miss you, and am sorry that you don't have closure on Obie. :( Hopefully that will come one way or another.

I'm thrilled, though, about your focus on original stuff. You are a great storyteller, writer, etc, and I'm glad you're going to give that some attention in that way. Yay! And yay for Nanowrimo!

Seriously, I do miss you. Life isn't good w/o my bi-monthly dose of Jed.

[tehomet.livejournal.com]

The so-called dirty stories don't hurt, but basically, like many people I am quite certain, I'm here because I enjoy whatever you write. So, I'm glad you're not taking down your lj or site, and more power to your elbow with the original fiction.

Regarding the embarrassment of the media-derivative aspect versus the smut aspect, I know exactly what you mean.

[dougiefelchtone.livejournal.com]

I'm not here for dirty stories.
I just enjoy talking to my friend.

[velvetglove.livejournal.com]

Are you going to do Nano again this year? I know they have all kinds of "rules" about starting something new, but there's no reason you couldn't commit to another 50,000 words of BTP, right?

I miss you, too. You'll have to come visit after we get back from nola and we can go to the nice Big Gay Disco.

[velvetglove.livejournal.com]

Sometimes I have a hard time understanding how it came about that I wrote so much about...Superman. I don't give a shit about Superman, and I never have. Except, apparently, I did/do. Sort of.

The day I thought I'd delete my journal, I got online and discovered that Wendi had bailed and I didn't want to be...coattailing her, I guess. And then I decided there was no reason to leave, though I do feel better just having stated that there's nothing more to be expected from me.

I'm being lazy, answering here rather than where you posted, but thank you for your kind wishes about the dog. He was a very sweet puppy and I am really missing him.

[rhiannonhero.livejournal.com]

Well, my current personal goal is 2k words per night until I finish it, Nano or no Nano. :) I'm behind by 2k words due to some neck cramping/pain yesterday, but I tihnk I'll be able to catch up this weekend. I'm back to being very excited about the project, and very focused on it. It deserves to be finished...yeah. So, I'm finishing it!!! :D

If I manage to get it done before the month of November is over, I do have another novel that I want to write (more like novella, I think) that I might finish the month out with. It is that one about the girl named Fiona, whose real name is Jasmine Lee? And she claims to be from New York, but she's really from Tennessee? Although, I might have her really be from West Virginia. I haven't decided. But I know how it starts...it starts with her in L.A. smoking a cigarette while looking out the window and thinking that when you're from Appalachia, it follows you wherever you go. Something like that.

Yes, when you get back from nola! I will come see you. Or you could come see me and we could go to the dirty, grimy Carousel.

[velvetglove.livejournal.com]

But I wrote them all for you!

[dougiefelchtone.livejournal.com]

Oh well, in that case I better get reading.

[dougiefelchtone.livejournal.com]

p.s. Can't wait to see you next weekend. It's been WAY to long.

[twigged.livejournal.com]

Dude, I would be so sad if you deleted your LJ. Most of the content here is non-Supes related, anyway, so it doesn't make sense to me. Please stay! *clings*

And, er... I announced the same thing in my LJ a few days ago. No more Clex for me, either. I do still have that pleasure slave!Lex AU that I'd like to finish, but I have serious doubts that I ever will.

I'm excited about whatever you write, though. Original, or cartoon dick, or whatever, as long as it makes you happy. Love you, hon.

[mei-x.livejournal.com]

My own personal interest in SV fanfiction has diminished to near non-existence. In any case, fandom and one's involvement in it shouldn't be about obligations at all, but about how much enjoyment one get out of it. So I respect your choices (and everyone else's for that matter -- that's why I didn't personally get all verklempt about the recent departures). People move on and as long as their lives are going well, that's great and I wish them well.

I'm glad you're still here, though, because I'm interested in the various things you have to say.

[batdina.livejournal.com]

will you share pictures of the public showing of your tiara? please?

[velvetglove.livejournal.com]

Oh, I'm staying! I did consider deleting (and activating evil twin itchymitten instead), but that doesn't do me any good; all it would do is make an official (and overly dramatic) division between fannish-focused and not. Except there really hasn't ever been a hardcore fannish focus to my journal in the first place, so what would be the point? Besides, as I mentioned in a comment above, the day I decided to delete was the day Wendi said goodbye, and I'm too big a diva to share bowing out ;)

xxoo to you, too.

[velvetglove.livejournal.com]

I haven't enjoyed fic in recent months - not because there hasn't been good writing, but because I no longer can engage with a happy-happy premise, and recent fic has mostly been "denialist" in nature.

In any case, fandom and one's involvement in it shouldn't be about obligations at all, but about how much enjoyment one get out of it.

Whether it's based in reality or not, the feeling I've had that there are people tolerating my presence in hopes of getting another story out of me needed to be addressed in some way so that I could get over myself and move on. I've hopefully done it with minimal drama/trauma ;)

I actually wasn't particularly surprised that the recent departures occurred, as I'd sensed dissatisfaction in those quarters for some time, perhaps because of how I've been feeling.

The journals I enjoy reading most (yours included) have relatively little fannish content, or it's in some way proportionate to the writer's life as a whole. On the few occasions when I actually like people, I do like them better than TV shows ;) I'm glad we'll remain in each other's orbits.

[velvetglove.livejournal.com]

If we get any, I certainly will. It will be Halloween in New Orleans and I'll probably be somewhat drunk, so if Mr. Glove or anyone else gets a good one of me, I'll post it. I take a better picture when I'm a bit tipsy, as I lose my fear of leering smilking on camera, so the possibility of something I deem attractive enough to post is good.

[velvetglove.livejournal.com]

I hadn't heard about that story before, with the girl, but it sounds promising.

Mr. Rhi should rub your neck and/or bring you ice cream, whichever would help most.

I like the Carousel. It's such a pit! And I like K-ville, and I like you and your dogs. I like Mr. Rhi, even if he disdains the company of the gayborg collective. So maybe it's my turn to visit...

[velvetglove.livejournal.com]

In the region of years, I believe. I am really excited to see you guys, and also to be returning to the smelliest, dirtiest, most humid armpit of unmitigated joy I have ever had the pleasure of visiting. Yay, New Orleans!

[pun.livejournal.com]

I just hadn't ever told them about the media/derivative aspect because that's what I find embarrassing. I can talk about cock all day long, so long as I don't have to mention that it's Clark Kent's cock that gets me all the positive attention online.

I feel the same way. Writing gay porn is not embarrassing. Writing stories about Clark and Lex being boyfriends? Very embarrassing. So here's my question, was their reaction what you expected? Did they seem to think that this hobby is indeed unbearbly dorky or we they just all, "ho hum"?

[rhiannonhero.livejournal.com]

Because I'm quite sure that you want the details (ha!), here's the dealio with the novella thingy. I went to that Writer's Marathon in Atlanta where you had to write from a prompt? Right? So, the prompt was "She says her name is Fiona..." And the first thing that came to mind was a terrible, dreadful poem, followed by the beginnings of a silly story:

She said her name was Fiona

She said her name was Fiona,
but it was really Jasmine Leigh.
She said she was from New York,
but she was really from Tennessee.

Jasmine Leigh was a stupid name,
Given to her by her mom.
Fiona was a cool name,
like the chick who sings those songs.

So Fiona she was when she landed the role
and Fiona to them she'll be.
But to me, the boy she once loved
She'll always be Jasmine Leigh.

Jasmine Leigh Armstrong took off for Los Angeles in the spring of 1997. With her hair cut short, and her skirt even shorter, she knew she'd be the next big thing. It was only a matter of time until she was discovered, and until then she was content with the idea of waiting tables, or dancing in a titty bar. She wasn't all that picky, because a girl's gotta follow that dream, where ever that dream may lead, right?

Her boyfriend, Mikey Johnson, the guy she'd dated since she was ten, wasn't dealing with her decision to leave Athens for stardom. He moped and threatened, before caving in and sobbing his heart out as he watched her beaten up Chevy pull away.

Jasmine didn't look in the rear view mirror, so she didn't know about that until he emailed her later to describe his theatrical disintegration in the wake of her leaving. Mikey was a drama queen, and he'd be much happier when he figured out that he was gay, but Jasmine didn't have the heart to tell him that.

The drive from Tennessee to L.A. was long and often dusty, with her tiny life packed into an even tinier suitcase. She wound through the countryside, rushed through the straights of Kansas, and burned under the heat of the Nevada sky. Freedom tasted fresh no matter what the road or the weather held, and she raced it to the Pacific Ocean, driving until she could feel the sea-spray on her lips.

Then she reversed, and it was back to the city to find a place to stay. Unlikely because she had no job, no friends, and no money, but Jasmine Leigh was anything but faithless. She believed, and like all true believers, she was duly rewarded by a complete stranger who noticed her lost expression.

Five hours, and a few coffee's later, she had a new landlady. So what if she was prone to lecherous gazes at Jasmine Leigh's breasts and hips. She didn't mind the idea of giving the old dyke a thrill. In fact, she felt she was doing her a service, and left her blinds up on purpose, often stumbled around the renovated house in nothing but a towel, and otherwise gave what she considered to be 'tips' for the generousity the landlady showed when Jasmine's rent check was late.

And, at first, it was always late. It wasn't long before she found a job that took advantage of her fresh face and southern accent--her body exploited for money, and she didn't mind. After all, what was the difference between using her body as a tool for money by lap dancing, and using her body for a tool by acting? Either way she was prostituting herself and her looks, but for some reason one was considered an 'art'.

Justifications or no, she was satisfied with her life, and began to attend the workshops that were prerequisites for wanna be starlets.

[velvetglove.livejournal.com]

smilking???

um, that'd be "smiling." Thank you for your patience.

[velvetglove.livejournal.com]

Well, most people seem "ho hum" about it because, very likely, they have dorky, embarrassing hobbies of their own. On the one hand, I'm glad that Mr. G doesn't find my hobby too embarrassing to share with his friends, but I'm finding that I do. It needs a context, IMO, and it's not the best first thing for people to know about me. Gay porn, sure - TV character gay porn, a definite NO.

I'm most upset about this one: he generously shared my LJ name with someone local who only knew that I wrote, actually, and whom I haven't spoken with since that revelation. For all I know, she doesn't care, but I'd have preferred to be the one to tell her about the derivative gay porn personally. Oh, and I also say that she's pretty in past LJ posts. Which is true, but it might seem stalkerish.

[velvetglove.livejournal.com]

Go! Write it! More!

And I like that he's gay, because I like stories that include gayness. Had you ever noticed that about me?

xxoo

[suzycat.livejournal.com]

*pats you*

Sorry, lassie, I ain't going nowhere.

[rhiannonhero.livejournal.com]

*gasp* Really? No way! God, that's such a coinky-dink! I like gayness in stories, too! Wow!

[oehel.livejournal.com]

For what it's worth, I'm glad you're staying anyway. I like your various posts, and I loove your writing, regardless of fandom/media/thing. :)
I'm so sorry about your dog - lack of closure sort of sucks. Take care?